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There's a wish

There's a wish I have to be in a far-off time for a while, Just for a day, to take flights of fancy and believe it all to be real There's a wish I have to be naive once more Just for a day, to see the world with wide-eyed wonder There's a wish I have to be free from society, Just for a day, to see everything without labels or reality There's a wish I have to detach from my mind Just for a day, to see myself without limits or fear Just for a day, just once I wish I could escape to innocence

Ephemeral Fantasies

The flickering glow of fire.. Transient- it enslaves us, as the surreal fantasy of permanence, makes a tantalising appearance. But like embers sleeping into darkness, Or footprints merging into the sea, every moment flees into the everlasting void But would the tree be a tree if it had only the disappearing leaves? Would we have the need to belong, to enshrine every memory, if we didn't wish for immortality? Is it even possible to see, without the shackles of illusion, at the only eternally beautiful moment- present, free yet ephemeral

Eternally Ephemeral

Last week I performed an Indian classical set at Severndoorg Castle as a part of someone’s independent project. While I went armed with my camera, there was no one to capture from it and the organizer was already planning to capture from her camera. As luck would have it, it ran out of battery midway and later we discovered that the major chunk of the video disappeared- all that remained was a 2-minute clip. It isn’t the first time I remain without tangible output of a memory. It’s no big deal , my mind says.. you yourself said it wasn’t a big deal . But Ah, my heart argues back, I meant not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, the way nothing actually is a big deal. But I did want some videos and photos… after all, I’m gracious enough to take for others and lend my camera for their occasions, so it seems unfair that… You’re beginning to whine , the ever-strict mind interrupts. Why didn’t you ensure it was captured on your camera? It is exhausting having to do everyt...

When Life is like a Sitcom..

Aren’t there are some moments in life - funny or awkward situations-, which when we look at as though from outside a TV, seems like we’re watching a sitcom? This post is about some such incidents- coz they’re sure worth preserving, even if just for the laughs. My general clumsiness (which I say is due to not paying attention!!), has caused some really embarrassing moments. From tripping while entering a huge auditorium to bumping into walls which always mysteriously crop up exactly when people are around- I’ve done it all. But the below is among the funniest of them all. When working in singapore, I was eating at the food court in office with a friend. The food was quite nice. But as luck (or lack of grip) would have it, I dropped the spoon onto my shirt- the spoon which had just now been in a bowl of Bhindi Masala dripping with oil and turmeric. Now turmeric is known to love clothes- and never leave it. I had to take immediate action. I went into the washroom and started washi...

Of all things lost...

When I was a small girl, Joy made my heart unfurl, When dad came home early, Or mom called me a fairy, With a sparkling eye I beheld every second, The outside world was yet to beckon… I've seen now the ways of the world, Fought every battle life hurled,  Yet even as I hope for something unfeigned,  A sense of awe every time is ripped, And a scar is deeply inked… Till all that will remain is a cynical armour, Of the wide eyed girl full of wonder. With experiences that burden my shoulder, Meaninglessly I drift and ponder, On love and friends, that are gone, On hopes and dreams bygone, But of all things that I've lost, I miss my Innocence the most... I miss my Innocence the most.. .

That Sinking Feeling....

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I let go and both me and my heart sank. “I’m going down”, I sputtered, water in my mouth and fear in my heart. My feet desperately tried to find the bottom to stand on, though my brain said it was stupid to do that in deep sea. I floundered and tried to reach for the ladder, when I heard him say “hold my hand”. I looked in the direction of the voice. Our eyes met. This was during a trip to Redang Island in Malaysia with friends. The trip involved a lot of snorkeling. And my relationship with water has always been uneasy. My experiences with seemingly innocent rounds of boating have become unintentionally adventurous in the past- precariously balanced narrow boats which rocked with every move, boats with a slow leak where we had to constantly bail out water. Add to this my penchant for watching ship wreck movies in my teens, water was just plain dangerous to me. Yet, given that I didn’t know to swim and the concept of life jackets was nonexistent in boating, I thought my fear was sens...

What I learnt @ Singapura....

On a short break to India recently, I was doing something that I always thought I wouldn’t - compare Mumbai and Singapore. Though I in no way am belittling Mumbai, yet constant comparison, even when not aloud, is almost ingrained in the human psyche. Yet the fact that I compared, led me to think what all had changed in me post life in Singapore. I had taken up a job in Singapore on instinct- I just knew that I must work there for a while. Most people advised me to come back to India, especially Mumbai- yet I knew at that point of time that would have been disastrous. Now after 7 months of working in Singapore and 1.2 years of being in there, I assess myself on the things that have changed in me, or that I have learnt. Some are surprising, some expected.  Taste in Beverages: I always consider myself to be an absolutely non-fussy and chilled out person as far as food is concerned. So a strong preference in beverages is a shocking revelation to me. Maybe it is a year’s drink from ve...